Thoughts and Feelings

For many years, the bird wants to fly high and far. He wants to see the beauty of the world and he knows that this is what he wants. Everyday, he looks towards the sea horizons to motivate himself. He always put in the extra efforts to make sure that he can fly fast and steady so that he can withstand the strong wind and rain. The bird grows stronger each day and he knows that his determination will make his dream comes true one day.

Through his friend, the bird met a sparrow and they fell in love. They flew together, ate together and played together. The bird felt fortunate to have such a wonderful companion with him. For many months, the bird has thought that the sparrow was happy with him as long as they are together. So he continued to focus on his training.

One day he found a good opportunity to fly out into the open sea. He was very excited to know about this. He told all his friends about it and of course to the sparrow who was all along supporting him. The sparrow wanted the bird to stay but she knew that this is his dream to fly out there. The bird convinced the sparrow that the trip would not be too long and he will fly back soon.

Just before the bird was going to fly off, he had a quarrel with the sparrow. The sparrow felt that the bird loved her but the bird did not understand her. She had problems telling her problems to the bird because the bird had always been very critical and did not think from her feeling and perspective. She wanted to fly high as well but she always had the problems of doing so. She wanted the bird to console her but the bird had always been criticizing her, making her feel that she was at fault all the while. She had also always felt stressed up because she wanted to spend more quality time with him, but her training had not allowed her to do so. And the bird had always focused on his training such that he had neglected her. It seems that both the bird and the sparrow are living in two different worlds. She finally told the bird of all these feelings.

The bird was very shocked and hurtful to hear about this... All along he had thought that the sparrow was happy with him. In the midst of training, he had lost track of time and feeling. He only focused on flying and paddling his wings. He had always felt that he was strong but the words of the sparrow crippled his wings. He felt that he was a very irresponsible partner in this relationship. Probably before that the bird felt that everything was alright because he was enjoying the relationship and so he assumed that the sparrow was enjoying. Probably the bird had concentrated too much of his training such that he had neglected her feeling. When the sparrow shared her problems with the bird, the bird had no intentions to hurt her. He just wanted her to be independent, to solve the problems and to grow and fly as high as him. What he did not know and that he had realized later is that the sparrow just needs to have a listening ear. She needs the quality time and attention, and most importantly the understanding of the bird.

Somehow, the misunderstanding could have arose because of the different worlds that they are living in. The bird is living in a competitive world where every stroke of the wing matters a lot to him. What matters most to the bird is that as long as he can fly fast and steady, everything would be fine. On the other hand, the sparrow is living in a very emotional world where feeling matters most. She concerns more on how other people feel and her own feeling as well. Therefore she notices on the details of every actions that the bird has done whereas the bird just focused on the bigger pictures. The sparrow thought with her heart first whereas the bird thought with his brain first. Probably this is the reason why the bird has neglected some of the details that the sparrow had picked up.

The bird wanted to change his way of doing things but the sparrow had stopped him. The sparrow did not want the bird to change because of her. The bird was in a state of confusion and he did not know what to do and what the sparrow really wants from him. But he knew that he needed time to digest and think of what the sparrow had just told him. He just wanted to have a quiet personal moment. Before that he only had the time to fly and he did not have the time to stop and think. He had some time to think before he flew off into the big open sea...

New Year Resolution for 2007

I must first thank the blessings for everything in the year 2006. Although it is a hectic year for me, I have enjoyed every moment of it. Highlights of the year include going on the Sri Lanka Trip, going on the internship and most importantly, to get to know Wei Zhen.. Coming to the end of this year, I am thankful that everything has gone well so far.

We will be approaching the new year in a few minutes time. It is the time for me to set my new year resolution again. I have thought of it for the past few days but frankly speaking, I do not know what to set this time round. But I know I want to set some goals so that I can work towards it to have a more fruitful life.

In no orders of importance, these are my new year resolutions:

• Save money (~20% of Allowance)
  I need to save sufficient amount so that I can spend during my internship in Shanghai and probably during exchange in Hong Kong
• Spend more time with Wei Zhen
  As I will be away for internship and exchange, I won't be in Singapore for half of the year. It will be a year of travel and new experience for me and I need to spend more time with her this year. However, this is going to compromise because I think there is an ESSENTIAL needs for me to mug for the coming term. I suppose it is a good idea to spend time with her and mug together since she has to mug as well... Haiz.. What a mugging couple.
  
• More exercise + Less Diet
  Have been putting on weights since last summer and it is going to increase further if I do not monitor closely... I really hope that my schedule allows me to exercise thrice a week.. Once on weekend and Twice on weekdays. Diet wise, maybe can be controlled with my budget? Must really get back to reality... IPPT coming soon after graduation!
  
• Putting on smile daily
  I wonder if I can achieve this. This is to reduce stress.. But yeah.. I think if I can smile daily, everything will go smoothly.
• Enjoying every moment and experience
  Going on an internship and exchange will be fun and enriching... I hope to learn more and enjoy more at the same time. It will be a great moments and experience for me. I also want to enjoy every moment with Wei Zhen as well.
  

In addition, these are my wish-lists for this year. It is not a necessity but is a good to have.. And yeah, I must work towards in getting them =)

• Digital Camera to capture all the defining moments
  
• Hard Drive to backup all my data
• A pair of Spectacles
• Bicycle
• ... (Adding on to the lists)

Yeah.. That's all and it is new year now! Happy new year to everyone! Happy new year Steven!

Love is in the air...

Merry Christmas! I must say this Christmas is really special for me... Not only that I have experienced the snowing effects from the rain, I have also been able to spend my Christmas with someone I like. I will never forget this Christmas.

I have been enjoying myself this holiday. Possibly to make myself drunk in this holiday after the long battle last term. After the previous post, have almost finished the InnovateIT tasks (except on waiting for the offices to claim the cash). I have also intended to mug but I have always resisted myself in doing so.

But this holiday, like the Christmas, is memorable because it is when I have spent the most time with Weizhen so far. We have got together more often, cycled together and watched many great movies: "墨攻", "The Holiday" and "Night At the Museum".

Wei Zhen, Thank for your love and everything that you have done for me. I really appreciate a lot. Like what I have told you, I'm really worried we won't have time for each other after holiday. But I'll think of you always. This post is meant for you. And I also want to say: 和你在一起，我也感到很幸福. Merry Christmas. Love Always...